THE MORNING AFTER....

The morning after, no this is not what you think it is. I am not referring to the 'walk of shame'. Walk of Shame, you know, when in your past life, or for some in your present life, you maybe have ughh, relations? with someone and the next morning you have to walk out their front door for the whole neighborhood to see you. Whats worse if your still in those 'going out cloths' from the night before... As a friend once pointed out to me, its pretty bad when your walking out and the neighbor on one side is out watering his lawn and the look you get is something along the lines of 'your not the one from before'. Yeah, well that's some of the past experiences I could relate to prior to my current relationship with myself and with God. Now those antics and laughs over brunch with the girls are really more uncomfortable these days. I mean they are still kind of funny, but in the grand scheme of things. You start to realize 'was it really worth it?' The answer is unequivocally NO.

Today its all about the morning after going out with 3 girlfriends to a girls night of Karaoke'ing. We had an absolute blast and we all went home alone of course, I think it was more amusing to be the ones that were sober and coherent compared to about 90% of the patrons of the establishment who were not so sober.
Lets just say we all had our chins on the ground a few times, watching the drunken antics of several around us. Including the 3 different men each poised in a triangular pattern around our table. I mean we had great views and were well within earshot to intake it all. Just to give you the cream of the crop, we had one, lets call him Justin, he is from Ohio and travels on business all over the US. He is there 'tying one on' as he so eloquently put it. He also went on to tell us all that we should just plan on heading over to his hotel afterwards, as he proceeded to tell us the room number and show us his spare key. Needless to say we all laughed it off in amusement. But I couldn't help, but to feel sorry for him and feel like I needed to keep talking to him, so I did. In listening to him I was amazed. I mean he was basically stating in no uncertain terms, that he was a 'great lay' (literally he said that) and said he felt bad because he is in a town for only a short time and cant really take the time to get to know women, so he has to succumb to the idea that its all about being 'respectful' he said and 'honest' in telling woman that its all about the great sex. Yes he tries to keep in touch with the ones that, as he stated, you really feel the chemistry and the ignition in bed. WOW. Need I say more on this one.
So here my response to him in a nutshell"

I told him under no uncertain terms would I be going to engage him in his quest for the night, I went on to tell him that maybe in the past, it would of been up for debate. But that now I have a relationship with God and a true respect for myself and for others. Especially with regard to our bodies, intimacy and sex. I further added that I sincerely plan on not sleeping with anyone until I meet my soul mate and the man I want to marry. The interesting part is that I felt so good about telling this total stranger this. I felt no embarrassment admitting my faith or my creed to myself and God. I actually felt proud and honored to admit that yes my past was different and I at one time kind of had his view on casual sex among consenting willing adults. But now, things are different for me.

I really felt it hit a little bell in his drunken rambling mind. Or maybe that was the 'last call bell' that got his attention. None the less, I felt a great pride in knowing that I stood up for my belief's, and my sanctity. Not only for myself, but for all single people, who really just want to be loved and held. For those who are on the path I am on and for those who are astray or 'looking' for something more in life and in their relationships. For all of us who want to find something more, something lasting, something meaningful and something with mutual admiration and respect. Something called love. The real kind, not the one that is confused with lust and instant gratification.

So here's to having a great feeling the morning after and to having a great since of relief. That I don't have to worry about ever feeling that agonizing lump in my throat, that since of guilt and wondering, "will he call me again?", "does this mean we will start seeing each other" or worse yet, walking away hoping you don't run into him again. I don't have to worry about these feelings the morning after, as long as I stay on my current path. I just hope that after we left last night that Justin didn't find a woman who this morning is feeling this way. And one day, hopefully, Justin will learn that his mornings after aren't going so great either and maybe he will change his view of casual sex and what real intimacy and love can mean if he would just wait for that someone special, and not the woman he meets after a night of drink specials.

Here is to a great new feeling and a great new 'morning after'.